Full of Bull since 1975.

Reality is overrated.

Welcome to my life of satirical suburban chaos.

My initials spell: HAM. Which is ironic because I detest ham, but I’m crazy about bacon.

Some people call me cynical, some call me comical, but usually it’s just the bipolar talking.

My husband and I have been together since we were 15 years old. There is nothing like teen pregnancy to make you realize ”LIFE” is not always a board game. (Although, when I would play “Life” as a kid I always wanted to fill my car with little stick babies. And this is called KARMA.)

I like to cook and bake. It gives me something to do when I’m not on Twitter or neglecting my children for reality tv.

So here we are, and now I’m opening a bakery. I used to blog about aches and pains of parenting, with a side of the best way to wash shit covered cloth diapers, or the worms in my compost. Now I talk way too much about cake and cake related whatnots.

I live in a place that looks like Stepford, but I’m not a Stepford Wife.

I prefer tattoos over batteries, and Peg Bundy to June Cleaver.

If you want to contact me, you can reach me at:

heathernkids@yahoo.com

or

@stepfordlife on TWITTER.

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