We’re leaving it.

I’m not good at conforming. I’m not like other people. Fitting in is never my goal, I’m just myself. I can’t put on a face and pretend. Living in Baxter has always been awkward for me (hello, I started a blog called Stepfordlife in 2006) but it has been especially difficult since I opened the store. “Don’t shit where you eat.”

I’ve pretty much gone into hiding from BAX activities and people because hiding is comfortable. This suburban neighborhood is filled with perfect rows of cookie cutter tract houses, nice cars, smiling faces, and gifted children. I’m not going to make fun of it, people think it’s fantastic and they love it. It’s just not for me. I tried to make it work but I get bored. And frankly, I’m bored. My business isn’t supported by the neighborhood for the most part, as a matter of a fact, it’s a major source of contention. I don’t have the time nor the patience for bullshit.

We’re moving one town over to Tega Cay -it’s Polynesian for “beautiful peninsula”. It began as a vacation retreat town in the 70′s so as you can imagine, it’s incredibly eclectic. When you drive down the street, you’ll pass round houses, pagodas, McMansions, and cottages. Yards might have pristine landscaping, no landscaping, a statue of a giant Buddha, or a kegerator built on the front porch.

We looked at probably 20 houses, and then we saw this.

Unfortunately, it also comes with this.

You might not think it’s that bad, but it is. Don’t worry, the pictures of the interior will be coming- as well as the duck wallpaper, pony walls, mirrored doors and a shower stall in the garage. I will be sharing all of the amazing views inside of this glorious piece of 1970s history while documenting the renovations as we go.

I’m upping my antidepressants, looking for another job to help pay for this monstrous undertaking, and will most definitely post the crazy while molesting pinterest, begging for advice from my friends, and tweet stalking Jeff Lewis. God knows I need all of the help I can get.

My only hope is that I don’t end up on an episode of Snapped.

But the kids and the dog are excited. And so am I. Bob and I grew up on an island, and the house I grew up in was on the Niagara River. While it’s certainly no great lake like Erie or Ontario where I grew up, Lake Wylie will do just fine.